Friday, February 17, 2006

East 2nd Half Predictions

"Hello Bobcats"

Atlantic Division

--One of the Big 3 will go down with a significant injury (2 weeks+)
--They will acquire a solid power forward of the Reggie Evans type
--Linton Johnson will announce that he will only go by “Lint” from now on
Final Record: 45-37 (3rd East)

--Allen Iverson will almost get traded
--Kyle Korver will pose for a Jockey ad
--Andre Iguodala will stop screwing around
Final Record: 38-44 (9th East)

--Doc Rivers will not get fired
--Al Jefferson and Kendrick Perkins will make Boston fans smile
--Brian Scalabrine will spend more time at the Boston School of Pasty Red Head Children than on the basketball court
Final Record: 32-50 (11th East)

--Mike James will con management into giving him a rich 3-year deal
--Eric Williams will get traded and you won’t even know/care
--Chris Bosh will agree to a sponsorship with John Ashford turtlenecks
Final Record: 33-49 (10th East)

--Nate Robinson will win the Slam Dunk Contest, develop an ego, and somehow make this Knicks team even worse
--Larry Brown will cry at least once, either on the bench or at a press conference
--Isiah will acquire Keith Van Horn, Raef Lafrentz, Kenyon Martin, Adonal Foyle, Theo Ratliff, and Carlos Boozer and finally admit he’s being paid by George Steinbrenner to make the Yankees’ boss look good
Final Record: 20-62 (14th East)

Central Division

--One of their starters will go down with a severe injury
--Chauncey Billups will win the MVP, once again displaying the incompetence of the media
--Carlos Delfino will develop into an impact bench player
Final Record: 67-15 (1st East)

--LeBron will turn in a performance that forces us to debate the best game of the year with Kobe’s 81
--Danny Ferry will surprise us by making an impact deal
--Someone will punch Damon Jones’ lights out (my dream)
Final Record: 49-33 (4th East)

--Jamaal Tinsley will be injured
--They will defeat New Jersey in the 1st Round of the Playoffs
--Larry Bird will discuss trading Jermaine O’Neal this summer
Final Record: 45-37 (6th East)

--We’ll start to see more of the ‘04-05 Bobby Simmons
--Andrew Bogut will break his nose…again
--Toni Kukoc will file for AARP
Final Record: 46-36 (5th East)

--Jon Paxson will make an eye-pooping move this week (Ray Allen?)
--Ben Gordon will be foolishly dealt away
--Luol Deng will make a run at Most Improved Player
Final Record: 41-41 (8th East)

Southeast Division

MIAMI HEAT (33-20)
--Dwyane Wade and Shaq will be virtually unstoppable
--But, the team will get slaughtered in the Eastern Conference Finals
--Shaq will heavily contemplate retirement
Final Record: 53-29 (2nd East)

--Gilbert Arenas will drop 50 points at least twice
--Caron Butler will make them forget about Larry Hughes
--Michael Ruffin will be fined for bribing Bill Walton to say this last Wednesday during the Wiz-Mavs game: “A fade-away 20-footer! And Dirk did that against one of the league’s most prolific defenders in Michael Ruffin.” (ESPN needs to be careful; people could actually die of laughter)
Final Record: 42-40 (7th East)

--Dwight Howard will get scary good seemingly over night
--Darko will average 12 and 6 the rest of the way
--The Magic will draft Adam Morrison, giving the team the best young frontcourt in the NBA
Final Record: 25-57 (13th East)

--Marvin Williams will start to open your eyes (you know who you are)
--Al Harrington will be traded
--Josh Childress will sneak into the 6th Man of the Year race
Final Record: 25-57 (12th East)

--Emeka Okafor will not return this season
--Brevin Knight will not be traded
--The team will obviously draft Rudy Gay
Final Record: 19-63 (15th East)


At 5:40 PM, Blogger Ryan Kinkade said...

I'm pretty stoked... I got an email response I wrote to Tim Legler put up on the Daily Dime on the 13th. I made an entry about it.

At 6:48 PM, Blogger Anthony Peretore said...

That's dope Ry, too bad I HATE Tim Legler. Did you ask him why he still talks with a ghetto slur? Is it to impress Greg Anthony?

At 8:07 PM, Blogger Will Shu said...

i think charlotte would rather get Morrison because they Wallace to cover for morrison if he makes a mistake on D (which hes bound to do five times a night) and they need a shooter (kareem rush sucks)

At 2:19 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Yeah, what Bill Walton says sometimes are pretty out there. I remember one time in a Warrior's game he said that Brian Cardinal is a future hall of famer...........yes Brian Cardinal.

At 12:16 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I wouldnt call the bulls trading for ray allen eye-pooping... but it is kind of eye-popping if you think about it
Also, do you really think the bobcats would take rudy gay? Why not adam morrison? They dont have any real shooters and have a rudy gay clone with gerald wallace


At 4:45 PM, Anonymous Curtis said...

Agreed. Morrison is a perfect fit on Charlotte since Wallace can atone for his defensive deficiencies, and the team really needs a go-to scorer, specifically a shooter. I feel like with Gay, who's already a stud defender, you're getting more of the same as what Wallace gives you. I understand the kid is young and still has plenty of development left in him, but do you really see that fiery competitiveness and tenacity in him that is necessary of take charge scorer? I don't believe you can learn those attributes, they just come naturally a la Adam Morrison.

At 9:11 AM, Blogger Anthony Peretore said...

I hate debating draft picks this early because for all we know Tiago Splitter will be the #1 overall pick. Look at the NFL mock drafts right now. They are probably very accurate in terms of where players SHOULD go. But after 19 combine workouts, who benched 225 lbs. 76 times, which player ran the 40 in 4.3, etc. players move up and down the boards on a daily basis. It's ridiculous. And it's the same thing in the NBA. 2-3 "projects" will be taken ahead of JJ Redick, a player with perhaps the deadliest shot of our lifetime, and balls the size of cantelopes. And why is this the case? Because teams are always looking for the Kevin Garnetts rather than trying to nab a couple Richard Hamiltons/Chauncey Billups. So, who will the 'Cats take? I agree with you that Morrison fits best, but will Bickerstaff really pass on Gay? Who knows?


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